Smackdown Rundown for March 26th!

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Smackdown March 26/09

Do you know the way to San Jose? Smackdown sure does and you know why? It’s the night before the Hall of Fame, it’s two days away from the biggest show of the year, and this is your FRIDAY NIGHT SMACKDOWN REPORT! No wasting time this week, Todd and Matt are introducing guys as soon as the opening theme is over. Here comes Kane.

Match One: Ten Man Tag Match featuring the Money in the Bank Players

This match went pretty long, but it was good for what it was. When you have that many guys in a tag match it can be tough getting everyone ample and equal time in the ring. Christian had some good spots here, as well as Shelton Benjamin, who did a great leap to the top rope to hit a big spot on Evan Bourne. The match ended with Drew McIntyre making use of his Futureshock DDT on Christian, and then making himself out to be the winner of the match before it even started, by setting up the ladder and working his way to the top. The rest of the MitB hopefuls come back to the ring and put a hurt on him. I don’t know who it is that wants this guy to succeed so badly, but I think the way they’re trying to shove Drew down our throats is a bit much, almost to a point where I want him to fail just to be contrary to the Company.

At this point, we’re being given shots from Wrestlemania Fan Axxess, and it looks pretty impressive. It’s one of the reasons that I think WWE should have a physical Hall of Fame and Fan Interaction centre somewhere. The boys run down the rest of tonight’s card, Beth vs. Vickie, and Jericho cutting an awesome promo. An Undertaker and HBK promo comes up and as always, it’s fantastic. Commercials and Laura Diakun is off tonight. I’m a tad upset…

A Wrestlemania Promo runs with Kevin Rudolph. Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler pop up and show off some more Axxess, and they go on to throw to Edge vs. Jericho package number four. Or maybe it’s three, I don’t know. I’ve seen so many now, that I’m getting them all confused. I understand why they’re doing this, but I’ve seen these all to death and it’s really taking away from the Smackdown program. Especially since tonight they won’t be furthering the Punk and Mysterio angle. We can see the lead up so far, but nothing new, something that would help to get people amped for the match, especially since it just started only a few weeks ago. That’s something I’ll get into later.

Tough Enough alumnus Josh Matthews is backstage in San Jose, and has the Miz and Big Show. What’s the short version? Big Show is facing R-Truth tonight, and he’s going to be feeding him the mallet on the end of his arm. Man, Miz is annoying. I do like Big Show’s new shirt, however.
Vickie Guererro is on her way down to the ring, and she’s got something up her sleeve other than elephant ears. If you get that joke, good for you.

Match Two: Beth Phoenix vs. Vickie Guererro

Beth hit the ring first, but Vickie wasn’t far behind. Not only was she not far behind, but she has a newsflash for the Universe. Tonight, Beth will be competing in a five on one match. LayCool, Alicia Fox, and Maryse come down to the ring, and join forces with Vickie to attempt to extinguish the firebird Beth Phoenix. Beth beat up on Layla pretty good, and at one point tosses her at Michelle McCool. Layla did another cool spot where she grabbed Beth’s ankles and everyone ganged up on her, so Vickie could come in and get the pin. The heel Divas all encourage Vickie to get up on the ropes and hit a frog splash, which I’m happy to report, didn’t happen. Face Divas hit the ring, and clean house. Mickie James and Gail Kim both had impressive spots, and once the ring had cleared somewhat, Beth got her hands on Vickie. Unfortunately, what she grabbed wasn’t staying attached to Vickie’s body. Her pants came off, and a shred of my manhood that was there will never be again. The last thing I needed to see was Guererro running to the back, in pink granny panties, with the silver lettering Excuse Me on the ass. It’s kinda funny, but mostly gross. Striker threw up in his mouth a little bit. That’s good television.

John Cena/Batista promo comes up next, the same sorta thing I’ve been seeing. It’s good, just repetitive. Commercial time and I think I’m having some Dr. Pepper.

As we come back from commercial, Chris Jericho is introduced and kicks that great saunter down to the ring. The heel is dripping off this guy like sap on a tree in the Gourley Park Forest. Some of the crowd is chanting Spear, but it’s kinda weak. Jericho goes on to say that he’s going to win on Sunday, and retain the belt. Jericho says no one in the business has ever come back from as many injuries as Edge has. He has every tool it takes to beat Jericho, except for one thing. DNA. Y2J’s DNA is superior to all of ours, and to Edges. This is a pretty cool promo. Toss in some science, and we all have a good time, right Bill Nye? That’s right.

Chris goes on to blame his mother, his father, his grandparents, and his DNA for his multiple injuries. He plans on locking his Walls of Jericho and rupturing Edge’s career once again. Edge hits the stage, and makes his way out to beat down Jericho. He lands a few shots and sets up for the Spear, but Jericho is able to get away. Edge poses with the belt and Jericho does the best heel back off I’ve seen since CM Punk got beat up by Rey a few episodes ago.

When we come back from commercial, we get a look at the Wrestlemania 26 Reading Challenge, and how some kids were in a contest. Wish I could be in a contest… stupid kids. I still blame Mrs. Lawson for screwing with MS Readathon prizes at CH Bray back in the day.
We go back to Cole and Lawler, pitching Axxess and the Hitman/McMahon angle. This is a good video, and I’m interested in the match, but I worry Bret may come out of this worse for wear. I hope there’s some color, even though we know WWE is trying to stray away from blood. Just seems like they should go for blood, no pun intended.
When we return, Big Show is going to be taking on R-Truth. What technical prowess awaits us…?


So, I’m sick of Keystone Light commercials, and we get back to the show. There’s some more footage from Axxess, including a suit that belonged to Andre the Giant. That’s kinda creepy. Cole and Lawler just mentioned the Hall of Fame and I’m just pissed off about that. I mean, sure I can watch it on Youtube later on, but I would still rather watch it on television. I miss DirectTV…
We are now seeing the second Cena/Batista promo of the night, just in case some of us forgot that those two are having a little to-do on Sunday. I have a feeling Cena is going over, but I hope Batista holds on a little longer. He’s a great heel.

When Smackdown returns from the ads, they’re going to have an ‘in-depth’ look at the HBK/Undertaker match. I would assume that means they’re playing the same promo again.

This weeks Wrestlemania Recall is one of my favorites. I really enjoyed all the movie trailers for Wrestlemania 21, they brought the MitB to the Show of Shows and it gave rise to the Rated R Superstar, Edge. It makes me miss Benoit though, he had some great spots in that match.
We get back into Axxess with Cole and Lawler, and they actually have a graveyard for all the previous Undertaker victims from the other Mania’s. The best part is the freshly dug grave for Shawn Michaels. If that isn’t foreshadowing, then what is? I have got to get to one of these events. Fingers crossed for Vancouver.

So the HBK/Undertaker promo looks to be a new one, and it’s pretty awesome. Sim Snuka will be part of Mania history for helping to take that outside bump, so I guess that’s something to hold onto. If Shawn is really going and this is the end of HBK, then I hope he stays that way. Go down to Florida once in a while, and help train the next generation if you get the itch. But just stay home, man. You’ve done your job, and you’ve done it well. Just fade to black and be done with it. And for GOD SAKES, don’t Flair it up.

Cole and Lawler sum it all up, as best as they can, with what’s already been said. A tale for the tape is fun, but it was better when it was Cole and Tazz. Cole predicts HBK to win on Sunday and King predicts Undertaker, based on his multiple weapons at his disposal. With the match being No DQ, it should be entertaining to say the very least. Cole throws it back to San Jose and we got Morrison in slow-mo! No fur either, thank god. Daddy Squirrel is coming home for dinner tonight.

Match Three: Big Show vs. R-Truth

John introduces Truth to the ring, and the music hits the arena. I keep waiting for someone to say Not Much when asked What’s Up. Maybe he should try it in Philadelphia. R-Truth says that was the best introduction he’s ever had so he introduces Morrison. They tried making fun of Unified WWE Tag Team Champions ShowMiz, but it doesn’t work too well. The fans aren’t totally into it, but it’s just weak. Show more or less manhandles Truth to start, but Truth evades a flying Big Show from the top rope. The Miz tried to interfere but Morrison threw him into the steel ring steps. He went to help R-Truth and they turned Big Show’s chokeslam into a DDT. The referee called for the bell as they continued to beat on Big Show. The Miz tried to help again but was knocked out and Morrison hits Starship Pain.

Show Overview

For what was mostly a clip show, this wasn’t overly terrible. The matches that were on were good enough, but I would really have liked to see some more Punk and Mysterio tonight, so I’m going to rant about it. When you JUST start a feud, you have to feed the fire that burns it into the audience. I would have loved to see Punk sitting on Rey’s front porch or something and cutting a promo. That’s all. Nothing physical and nothing that’s going to potentially injure him before Sunday. His promos have been stellar for the entirety of the Straight Edge Society, and I can’t help but love how crazy he gets. I said it before, and I’ll say it again. CM Punk is becoming a better evolved Raven.

So all in all, the show is about 6.5 out of 10. I’m all excited for Wrestlemania and that means that the company has done its job. So I guess you’re wondering what my Wrestlemania picks are going to be and I can certainly fill you in on all of that. Simply check out my blog, and you’ll get a full rundown for the Granddaddy of ‘Em All. It’s pretty funny, and there’s some good insight if I do say so myself.

See you next week.

Jeff Goodridge is a freelance writer and a lifelong wrestling fan. His favourite Mania moments include Wrestlemania III’s Ricky Steamboat vs. Randy Savage, and Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho vs. Kurt Angle for the Intercontinental Title and the European Title from Wrestlemania 2000. Both are complete wrestling clinics, and he encourages you to check them out, if you haven’t yet.